“I won’t kiss you, if you smoke.”

scenic hawaii 001-A

Hawaiian dawn.

When I began dating David back in 1977 and then got engaged to him in 1979, the one thing I hated about him was his cigarette smoking.  It made me nauseous to the point of feeling dizzy and queezy.

How did I get him to quit?  Well, I simply told him that I would not kiss him unless he did.

Guess what? That was enough motivation for him to stop smoking.  He quit cold turkey by sucking on cough drops and now hates the mere odor of tobacco on other people’s hair, breath, and clothing.

Wow!  Where there is a will, there’s a way.  If he can do it, anyone can.

I used to attend dinner parties where the hostess smoked.  She thought that by lighting up in the balcony of her apartment, she was doing us a favor.  However, the breeze blew the smoke right back into the dining room.  Ugh.  I no longer dine at her home.

Why do people smoke in the first place?  Glamour?  Stress?  Peer pressure?

Whatever the reason, do stop.  It won’t be easy, but if David could do it, so can you.

11 Responses to ““I won’t kiss you, if you smoke.””

  1. Olga Says:

    Yes! Great message.

  2. Suzanne Says:

    I am so glad I never started. I had a friend that learned a guy she liked wouldn’t date a smoker. She quit cold turkey, they dated for one year, and the day they broke up she started again.

  3. DrumMajor Says:

    Glad David was able to quit!
    As to why people start: it was accepted, people didn’t know it was dangerous, their parents smoked, more available than booze, and addictions are hard to stop.
    Yep, I’ve known people to “step outside” and they don’t realize until told, that the wind currents blow it right to the non-smokers.
    Whenever I’d go out with my high school buddies (2 of them smoked,) we’d all see which way the air current flowed in the restaurant, and we’d switch places just so I wasn’t in their smoke. That was just kind, thoughtful friends, as that was back in 1970, long before we knew about 2nd-hand smoke.
    (Besides, the reed instrument players weren’t supposed to smoke or chew gum. Yep, my high school band was strict, but the best)
    Cheers, DrumMajor

  4. SchmidleysScribbling Says:

    After living with chain-smoking parents and a husband who smoked a pack a day, I finally married a man who does not and never will smoke. David’s Mom and sister Peggy died of lung cancer, no doubt linked to their foul smoking habits. Only one of my kids smokes (like his father who has had throat cancer). I wish he would stop, but he is the one who must decide. Hoo-ray for David who stopped smoking at the gentle urging of you.

  5. Denise Says:

    Both my parents smoked. My Dad started when he was young, my Mom when she was sitting in the air-raid shelters during WWII. Someone offered her a cigarette and said, “Here, smoke this, it will calm your nerves” and so began a life-long habit. It’s no excuse but everyone I knew smoked, all my relatives, all my friends except my sister. Thankfully I married a man who never smoked in his life and I quit soon after. That’s been over 37 years ago.

  6. Christine Says:

    great advice Gigi, I’d say you did David a big favour to quit, healthwise!

  7. Joanne Says:

    Good for David, and good for everyone who quits. They smell so much better.

  8. granny annie Says:

    I stopped smoking on November 6, 2003, the day I had my “widow maker” heart attack. My husband stopped smoking in September, 1996. Both of us had smoked since we were very young persons. It was simply the thing to do. I am glad that we both quit but as much as I would like for all of my loved ones to do the same I would never dictate or preach to them about it because I will always remember how difficult it was. I would never fail to kiss someone I love. If Ron had vowed not to kiss me until I stopped smoking and I had not survived my heart attack then we would never have had that final kiss. We never say goodnight without a kiss.

  9. Grannymar Says:

    It is always good to hear of someone giving up smoking, but it’s not easy. The person really must want to give up from the inside in order for it to happen. All the nagging in the world will only send them in the other direction.

  10. Linda Reeder Says:

    I have never really understood smoking either.

  11. L...w Says:

    Husband says the same thing as David…as a former smoker he can’t stand the smell of smoke.

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