Be with people you love who love you, too

David and I stood near his sister Wanda’s grave at Hawaiian Memorial Park in July 2007.  She died from internal bleeding at the age of 52.  We miss her.

Today, I will be seeing my new doctor for the second time.  At the first visit, he suggested I take three new supplements (Krill Oil, Magnesium Oxide, and Vitamin D3).  More supplements will be added later.  He also suggested I stop taking Calcium, because recent studies have shown that it leads to a higher risk of heart attack and stroke.  The plaque in your arteries is made of calcium.  Further, he said that multivitamin pills often lead to cancer in men.

Gee whiz.

Well, I have decided to follow his advice.  David and I went to Costco and purchased those three supplements and have been taking them ever since.

However, I have to laugh at the memory of my mother taking so many supplements and my ex-boyfriend telling me that Mom was just making expensive urine.  She is now 99 years old.  Maybe, her longevity can be attributed to her taking all those supplements.

Anyway, I don’t feel that great right now.  I don’t feel buoyant, happy, or energetic.  I think this malaise is due to my grief over the death of my sister’s husband, Pete, on Tuesday.  I wrote about it in my previous post.  It will take a while for all of this to sink in.  Eventually, I’ll bounce back and will feel better.

If David were to die, I would feel so lost and lonely.  Despite our many disagreements throughout our marriage, we do get along most of the time.  We were separated for only three days in 1998 when he went to Kauai for a business convention.  Other than those three days, we have lived together non-stop for nearly 35 years.

I can just imagine what Sylvia is going through, now that Pete is gone from her life.  They were together for almost 45 years.

I will end my post with this advice:  Be with people you love who love you, too.  Nothing else matters.

12 Responses to “Be with people you love who love you, too”

  1. Grannymar Says:

    Your advice to ‘Be with people you love who love you, too’ is easier said than done for me. The love of my life died seventeen years ago and I have no relations within 125 miles. As you know I am a very positive person, in my book, allowing grief to take over, is an insult to the memory of our lost loved ones, I prefer to celebrate the memories of their lives with joy!

  2. Beatrice P. Boyd Says:

    Being with thise yiu love is good advice, even if you can’t be with them or see them because of distance. Like yourself, Gigi, I do spend most of my daily time with my husband and best friend, Pat. Unlike you and David, our time together is shorter, but no less treasured. I also write, email or call friends and famiky weekly because even if we can’t see one another (not incouding Skype or FaceTime) we can still remain close. You will notice that I did not include the so-called social media of Facebook, Twitter and the like as I avoid those entirely.

  3. DJan Says:

    I am close to my sister, although she lives on the other side of the country. We use FaceTime and texting to keep in touch, as she is my soul mate and I cherish every bit of time with her. And then there’s Smart Guy, and I give thanks for him every single day. My heart goes out to your family and especially your sister.

  4. L....w Says:

    l stopped taking calcium a year ago for the same reason. I also read about multivitamin and cancer, however l wonder if it depends on whether you already have cancer (and to some degree cancer cells are always present) that multivitamins could accelerate cancer growth. I guess when you are older the scales tip in favor of not taking too many vitamin supplements. Interesting that your doctor recommends the specific catalysts that might be lacking. We still take multivitamins but I question the need for it. I am very mindful of carb consumption as it might be the culprit to a lot of diseases.

  5. Hattie Says:

    My condolences. We cherish friends and family,knowing that our days are numbered.

  6. Christine Says:

    so sorry for your loss. Life is not easy

    I take vitamin D, I heard the same about calcium but will tell my husband he takes multivitmins.

  7. mmmm Says:

    I read your blog daily, I so agree with you, my brother in law lives with a woman who yells and wishes him death she throws stuff around and causes a lot of crap in his life, all for his reason of having a “woman” and not being alone, he is a victim of domestic abuse plain and simple but at 65 he will never change, he has many problems, ptsd from the Vietnam war and a former marriage whereby his children were taken from him and adopted out to a loving family, he only chooses mentally ill women and women with many health problems I think he enjoys being a caretaker and long suffering..His mother stayed with a man her husband for many years he was no man in my estimate never worked, had affairs and drank and took drugs and produced 8 kids, some husband and some father but she was married and that is all she cared about she thought her kids would take care of her, some kids they took her money drank, and drugged but she had them around for sure..I think life is for the living and living well with someone who truly cares and loves you, life is precious and short, my mother in law lived to nearly 87 and her good for nothing husband 74 and they both smoked like smokestacks and he drank like a fish in water..No one gets out of this life witihout their Karma they both regretted their lives I am HAPPILY MARRIED TO HER OLDEST SON AND HE IS THE MOST WONDERFUL FELLOW A PERSON COULD EVER HOPE TO MARRY AND BE A DAD TO BOOT, he is not at all like them both of them, I got the best of the whole bunch..I am a middle child lost my Mom to cancer young and suffered because of no Mother and a Daddy who went to drink over her untimely death, one can only love and be with those you love and that is the naked truth..I have to take vit d but I got kidney stones from too much calcium so I get my calcium in food forms and I also drink plenty of water and eat tons of pineapple and oranges and blueberries, kale and spinach too..luv your blog aloha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  8. SchmidleysScribbling Says:

    Good advice Gigi. I try to remember that daily. Adjusting to both of us at home has been difficult at times, but so far we muddle through. Probably good you are older than David. Again, my condolences for your loss. I am sure your family will rally around your sister.

  9. Granny Annie Says:

    My heart goes out to your sister, you and all her family. You will be a much needed support for her as she deals with the loss. My sister has been such a godsend since Ron died, though I know she has felt a loss too. She and Ron were great friends.

  10. mmmm Says:

    I meant to say how very sorry about your loss, when one loses a member of their family it can never be replaced, she does live in your heart and mind and soul..Again condolences upon the passing of your sweet relative, life is so short, enjoy it with those who love and you love them too..aloha!

  11. marmeladegypsy Says:

    I am reading this backwards, so of course have just read about your mother. And now to hear of Pete — and so young. Oh, Gigi — you have had such a pile on your plate these weeks. I’m so very, very sorry.

  12. Bella Rose Says:

    Gigi, I just read this post and the post about your mother. You have been dealt a lot of grief in a very short time. Hugs for you!

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