David in his thirties.
David came into the house after cleaning the gutter.
David: There was a lot of dirt in the gutter.
Me: How did dirt get into the gutter?
David: It came from the roof.
Me: How did dirt get on the roof?
David: I don’t know. I am not God. God made the dirt.
* * *
David made the coffee this morning.
Me: Why do you put in heaping tablespoons of coffee? You should level them.
David: I like my coffee strong.
Me: Well, it would taste better if you measured the coffee properly.
David: Hmm. Maybe I should make it with milk.
Me: What? You want to pour milk into the coffee maker?
David: No! You fool! I meant mix milk with my oatmeal.
Me: That was a non sequitur. We were talking about coffee, not oatmeal!
* * *
Hard to believe, but we have been married for almost 35 years.